Thoughts

I never really just sit down and type things that i have going on in my head, i usually have a specific topic but today i thought that i would just let you in on some of my thoughts. Have you ever wondered why women are so obsessive about their weight? Well i think that the main reason is the media, you see size 0 models on the cover of every magazine and on every movie you watch now the actresses are tan, skinny and have had numerous implants, etc. How are we not to obsess? Do you think women back in the olden days thought this way? Probably not, and if so, not even close to how we are now. Its sad....just really sad. Health is suppose to be what matters yet many women will compromise that just to look good and look younger!

Switching gears now....

Have you ever wondered why its so hard not to gossip? I mean why is it when we talk to one of our friends that we automatically start talking bad about one of our other friends or about someone else, i think some people even just use it to have conversation but just dont realize the damage it can do. I am at fault here big time....here is something to think about. Would you say what you are saying to that friend about the other friend to their face even in a nice way?

Well Titus will just not nap today for anything and is crying now for the 2nd time, i thought he had went back to sleep after only sleeping an hour to begin with, but i guess not. Better go get him. Have a good tuesday everyone!!

Just another day in paradise

I thought id let everyone in on what its like in the Smith household monday-wednesday. I watch a little girl and her younger brother, if you didnt know that go here. Mornings consist of breakfast, playtime, veggie tales, music time and sometimes walks, then its naptime and after that lunch. Then more playtime and then an afternoon activity such as coloring or reading time. Then its off to nap again and pick up time is at 5:15pm or so. Of course any of you who have children or have taken care of children know that its not always smooth sailing, theres the occasional blow out diaper that requires a bath, fussiness b/c of teething which can make everyone miserable, etc. But for the most part.....its just another day in paradise. :-)

TITUS

PLAYING

BEST BUDDIES

KYLIE IN THE DRUM

AUSTIN IN HIS FAVORITE CORNER

Carrie and Adley

Whoa....boy am i glad to be sitting here resting at my computer after this day...it was a very eventful yet wonderful day....

Today my 2nd oldest sister Carrie came to visit. She has a little girl named Adley who is 5 months old, and a little sweetie if you ask me(and no im not just being a partial, proud aunt, she really is).

We had a lot of fun, this morning we went to Goodwill, i have not been there in a long time, i am trying to do better on spending, but we did find some really good deals. Carrie got some outfits for Adley and Malea, my youngest sister Becky's little girl who is 2 weeks younger than Adley(and also a sweetie), and i got some clothes for Titus and also a few bible videos.

After that we decided that we were hungry so we headed out to Fiddlestiks, a really good restaurant here in Hannibal.

Then we decided to come home for a bit and rest, i also forgot to mention that i was watching a little girl for one of my friends, her name is Kaylin and she is 13 months, so after taking 3 kids out and about all morning we needed a rest, lol. But it was a lot of fun.

Then we took Kaylin home and headed to Quincy. While in Quincy we went to 3 resale shops, we found a lot of good things, one of which was a cute jumperoo for my sister Becky for Malea, Adley has one and Malea likes it so they wanted to get one for her to have at home also.

Then we headed back to Hannibal and Carrie decided to drive back while Adley was sleeping in the car, since its about a 2 hour drive back.

It was a very fun day and i am so blessed to have sisters who love me and come spend time with Titus and I.

This weekend we are going to Fayette to see the rest of my family, Jarrell is going to golf with my brother in laws, and of course us girls will just hang out and play with the babies, i cant wait!

Have a great weekend everyone!

Baby Boy

Dear Sweet Baby Titus,

As i watch you sleep today i realized in a few short days you will be turning 18 months old, i just cant beleive it. I remember the first time i laid eyes on you, the doctor took you and placed you on my stomach and you just looked at me and whimpered, you were pretty mad about coming into this world, in fact, i wonder how long you would have waited if they didnt put me into labor, i was already 1 week and 1 day past my due date. I dont blame you, im sure it was quite comfortable and warm there in my womb.

But once you were here we just couldnt stop staring at you, you were so handsome, i remember your big brown eyes staring forward as you would nurse, and then eventually you would fall asleep and nothing could wake you, you slept so peacefully. I remember our last day in the hospital with you, daddy went to pull up the truck and get it warm(it was snowing and cold) and he gave you to me and we just sat there in my bed and fell asleep together.

Oh how i wish i would just bottle you up and you would stay a baby forever, but since i know i cant i am going to cherish every moment with you. I will leave no kiss unkissed and no cuddle uncuddled, no matter what the hour of day or night. Since I cannot keep you little forever, I will make the sweetest, deepest memories that I can, now while you are little.

There are days when i rock you and you have fallen fast asleep and i just cant put you down in your bed, i know there is cleaning, dishes and laundry to be done but i just sit and stare and you, at your sweet little eye brows, and your cute little ringlet curls. Im sure you will go onto be a great big brother to your brothers and/or sisters in the future and i want you to know that i love you very much and you will always be my first born and my little "ti pie".

All my love,

Mommy

Lord be near....

Things seem to be alittle bit more like normal around here today....but there is still that sadness in the air, i feel it in me and i see it in jarrell when he looks at me.

On Sunday i beleive that i passed what would have been the baby, i am almost 99% sure it was and that i miscarried. We will go to the doctor this week(when they call me back), to confirm it. There is still a little hope though, and we are not completely throwing the towel in, which i think may be harder than just having closer. But this week we will know something.

A verse that has given me comfort throughout this is "When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears, and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted, and saves the crushed in spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous; but the Lord delivers him out of them all." Psalm 34: 17-19

Lord be near..........

Waiting...

This is the hardest post i have had to write so far. As you know i am 6 weeks pregnant, on thursday morning i started to bleed and by friday it was a little heavier, i called my doctor and she said to just monitor over the weekend and if it got heavier or i started to cramp to come in. About 10pm on friday i started to get what felt like menstrual cramps, and then about 4am we decided to go into the ER, they did an exam and said that my cervix was still closed(which can mean the baby may still be ok) i am too early for anything to show up on a ultrasound so we pretty much just have to wait....they diagnosed me with threatened miscarriage, and told me to take it easy and wait.....so we are waiting.....and its not easy. I have so many thoughts going through my head i cant even type them all. Is the baby ok? Is there something wrong with my body? Will i miscarry? Will i go on to have this baby and then tell he/she what a scare they gave us? I just dont know, so we are to wait.......wait on the Lord and pray. Please pray for our family.

Curls, curls and more curls...

When Titus first started getting more hair and it was curling a little i thought maybe that his hair was going to be curly like his fathers(b/c of course its not like he gets anything else from his father, look at him!) Now i am definetely convinced that it is going to be curly. I mean look at how cute these curls are!!